My Letter to Trump Voters

By Don Varyu

Jan, 2020

 
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ear Trump voter,

I see you. I know who you are—and so do tens of millions of others. You can’t hide anymore.

This time around, you can’t claim, “oh, I didn’t know…”. Or, “I don’t really pay that much attention, so…”. Or any other lame excuse for his behavior. You know him. And thus, we know you. So, let’s proceed with stripping you down and examining exactly what you are.

  1. You’re a racist. Don’t bother with all your yelp and spittle. You’re a racist. If your defense is, “hey—you don’t know me!” Well, yes, true--and thank god for that. But let me break this down into an example even you can understand, because it contains an image you like so much—a wall.

Let’s say every Trump voter in America is a brick—part of a big brick wall. Can I testify that every single one of you bricks has overt racist thoughts every day? Of course not. Nor could I deny that maybe there’s an actual non-white person in one of your kid’s classes. Of that you really like that black halfback on your NFL team. Maybe all true--but that doesn’t matter.

Here’s what does—and where the image gets a little tricky. You see, every brick wall needs something to hold the bricks together. It’s called mortar. And in the wall of Trump, that mortar is racism. It’s the glue that binds all you sorry blockheads together. It’s a mixture of your perverted immigration fears…your need for multiple automatic weapons to defend yourself against a mongrel horde…and your pathetic whining that, “blue lives matter, too!”  Just stop.

It’s obvious in the people you elect to Congress, and all the slack-jawed yahoos who populate Dear Leader’s hate rallies. You delight in his “clever” dog whistles--which is ironic, because your dogs are smarter than you are.  

It doesn’t matter how pure you believe your own personal brick is, because you willingly bind yourself to all the other Trump voters with your shared racism. To deny this is meaningless. It’ like someone saying, “well, yeah, I did march in the KKK rally—but I didn’t wear a sheet!”

Doesn’t matter. You’re a racist.

2. You’re an idiot, or an asshole—and quite possibly both. There’s a compound thought here, so I’m going to break it down so that you can follow along. First, the idiot part. Let’s begin with a concept that apparently eludes you: there are these things called facts. They’re different from opinions. They exist in the real world and are demonstratable. For example, let’s take climate change. You may think it’s a hoax. But the Earth really is getting warmer. There is visible evidence which most other humans and virtually all animals perceive. 

Those calving glaciers aren’t Hollywood special effects—they’re real. Those millions of acres of farmland turning to deserts every year aren’t happening because the farmers decided to take a few months off. No real scientist disputes this, and If you deny climate change—and other obvious truths—you’re obviously an idiot.

Let’s proceed to your precious conspiracy theories. You clutch them closer than grandma’s bible. You can’t see that these myths are dreamed up by people (see assholes, below) who use them to make money from people like you. Inside the White House, Trump actually told a group of conspiracy authors, “the crap you people come up with is unbelievable!”  But at the same time, Trump also laughs at you because he knows you’ll believe all of it. Let me lay out a few examples. There is no Deep State. Hillary Clinton did not run a pedophilia ring in the basement of a D.C. pizza parlor. And those sweet little kids at Sandy Hook really did get slaughtered. Those kids are dead. And so are your brain cells. Because you’re an idiot.

Uh, what’s that you say? You don’t really believe all that conspiracy stuff--but you’re still going to vote for Trump anyway? Well, that moves you into category number two. You’re an asshole. I wish I could think of some word less profane, but sometimes only one conveys the perfect understanding, and this is one of those times.

Here’s how we recognize you. You cut people off in traffic. You cut in front of people standing in line. You cheat on your taxes, lie to your friends, and either write your kid’s college admission essay, or pay someone else to do it. 

It’s not enough for you to do whatever it is that makes you think you win…you also need to see someone else lose—in humiliating fashion. That’s fun for you, right? Trump’s code of lie, cheat and steal not only makes sense to you—it’s your life strategy. 

You don’t like people who aren’t like you, and you don’t want to be around them. Which makes it easier for you to believe you’re superior, when in fact you’re a blight on your species. Most people around you know you’re an asshole, but they don’t say it to your face, because they’re not assholes.

I’m here to speak for them.

3. You’re hateful. Don’t deny it. For decades, the political leaders you adore have been teaching you one thing, over and over--who to hate. And under the tutelage of professor Trump, you’ve now earned your master’s degree, with full dishonors.

So, class, repeat after me. Who do we hate? 

Elites? Very good. They have used their native intelligence and hard work to succeed in their lives in a way that somehow has made you fail in yours. 

Liberals? Of course! People who believe that people like you should have more opportunity must be up to something sinister. 

The news media? Certainly so. Their perverse obsession with this truth thing is designed to undermine what you believe. Don’t let them get away with it.

And yes, most of all, people with a darker skin tone than yours. (If you’ve lost the thread here—which is more than likely—please refer to point #1 above.) 

Now, I’m going to close with an admission. Maybe you think that me calling you hateful is hypocritical. Well…exactly so! But unlike you, I admit it.

I do despise you. I don’t want to make nice with people like you. So, does this hatred end with me wishing something terrible for you?   Like a horrible death?

Nah. I’d rather watch you live and suffer. Justice demands only one thing for you and your ilk. 

Infertility. 

Because as soon as your genes are out of the pool, the sooner we can get back to a functioning democracy and a functional society.

Know this. Donald Trump is an existential threat to the very idea of America.

And so are you.  

Sincerely,

Reality


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